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 pbee
(@pbee)
Noble Member
Joined: 15 years ago
Posts: 2097
06/04/2015 12:54 am  

Man I’ve had a busy time of it lately, so have’nt been around here for such a long time.
Most of my spare time lately has been in my home studio re-recording a collection of my songs that I will publish as a CD or iTunes.
Café Culture
Santa Monica
Still Blue
Castles in the sky
Road to Somewhere
Calorie Commandoes
Game Over
Long Time
Going Places
Watching Listening
Ballad of St Patrick

Plus I had to move house, and in the middle of that house sit another as well.
And to top it all off my internet isn’t connected yet so this is via my phone. Anyway I did find some time to write this.

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=13093783

Secrets
© 2015 Copyright Paul Brady

Ive got my reasons to be with you tonight
I keep them secret, keep them in, and hold you tight
You don’t know, but that’s alright
What I know will keep me with you, tonight

You’ve got your reasons to be with me right now
And I can see that, don't need to know, the why or how
But I know, and it’s alright
The things you know will keep you with me tonight

Please don’t say anything
Just let the moment be
No need to fill the empty space
…………………….……just breathe
just breathe

You know these secrets these things we keep to ourselves
We can’t define them, they’re mysteries only felt
But you know, that it’s alright
The things we feel will keep us here tonight

original version
=============
Ive got my reasons to be with you tonight
I keep them secret, keep them in, I hold them tight
You don’t know, but that’s alright
What I know will keep me with you, tonight

You’ve got your reasons to be with me right now
And I don’t see that, I need to know, the why or how
But I know, and it’s alright
The things you know will keep you with me tonight

Please don’t say anything
Just let the moment be
No need to fill the empty space
…………………….……just breathe
just breathe

You know these secrets these things we keep to ourselves
We can’t define them, they’re mysteries only felt
But you know, that it’s alright
The things we feel will keep us here tonight

Check out my Reverbnation page here


Quote
(@jamestoffee)
Famed Member
Joined: 12 years ago
Posts: 2852
06/04/2015 10:14 am  

Hi Paul,

Yes, it definitely sounds like you've been busy :shock:

I like the overall feel of the song and the idea of two people together with different motivations for the moment.

Suggestions:

Ive got my reasons to be with you tonight - good
I keep them secret, keep them in, I hold them tight- how about , AND hold YOU tight
You don’t know, but that’s alright
What I know will keep me with you, tonight

You’ve got your reasons to be with me right now
And I don’t see that, I need to know, the why or how…Consider reworking this b/c with the pause where it is, you are actually saying the opposite than if the line was heard in one phrase…..

You sing it like this:
And I don’t see that.
I need to know, the why or how…

Please don’t say anything
Just let the moment be
No need to fill the empty space
…………………….……just breathe
just breathe

You know these secrets these things we keep to ourselves
We can’t define them, they’re mysteries only felt
But you know, that it’s alright….BUT KNOWING THAT IT’S ALRIGHT
The things we feel will keep us here tonight..how about OUR REASONS/SECRETS WILL KEEP US HERE TONIGHT/WILL GET US THROUGH THE NIGHT

Thanks for sharing :D

James


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 pbee
(@pbee)
Noble Member
Joined: 15 years ago
Posts: 2097
06/04/2015 7:44 pm  

Hi James thanks for the comments,

"AND hold YOU tight"
absolutely, I like that a lot (why didnt I think of that :o ).

Im going to stay with the
"The things we feel will keep us here tonight"
because for me its the transition from logic to emotion which is the real secret.

cheers

Paul

Check out my Reverbnation page here


ReplyQuote

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